El dios, me ayuda por favo

Deseo dimitir de mi trabajo reciente.
Deseo conseguir un trabajo mejor.
Pienso, yo no tengo ninguna ocasión de realzar mi capacidad en esta oficina.

El dios, me ayuda por favo

~kruger~

My headache is bugging me everymorning...

I don't know when it started to bug me..
For couple weeks i've been bugged by my headache everymorning.
I feel pain everyday all over my body, it's like i've been running..

What will happen next?
Why can't i describe what i feel, what i think..
It's like i can't control my brain any longer

What has happened with ma brain?
Did i spoil it?
Did i abandon it?
Did i neglect all the thought indeed?

Damn, i can't barely think..anything ..
My headache is starting to bug me..over ..over..and over..again...

~kruger~

I am begining to know you, is that ok?

Pfuih....Words after Words...
What are you trying to say?
Are you stone out of your mind?

For i don't know who you are..or perhaps i thought i knew you back then?
For we have through.".so little time "

well well well..
I am begining to know you.....is that ok?

DON'T LIE MY DEAR FRIEND, DON'T YOU FEEL EMBARRASED IF PEOPLE KNOW?

I am not gonna tell you how i know all your lies..
This is just so phatetic..
So untrue..

You told many lies to people..
And then you blame us for we remember all your lies..
And then you call us with...hmmm *i better leave this word unsaid*

Poor you..
You have seen many moon shines and many sun shines..
Shimmerred yourself with many experiences..

Damn..
I thought you've enchanced..but unfortunately you still live in the dreamworld, where all the realities lies in your fantasy..

Poor you..
I took a pitty of you..
Grow up...be wiser ..
And last,....BE TRUE TO YOURSELF...

~KRUGER~

THIS IS SURREAL

TRYING TO EMPATHIZE THE SITUATION IN ACEH....

What do you do when you see a huge wave-wall coming at you? You run. You run as fast as you can. You think: "This is surreal."

But you keep running ... until the water lifts you off your feet and sweeps you onwards.

It makes no difference whether you can swim or not.

The force carries you forward, and you become a living, breathing projectile. Grab onto something and you may live.

Surf the wave and you have a chance. Hit something solid, and you die.

TO MY BELOVED BROS AND SISTAS IN ACEH, AND ANYWHERE ELSE IN THE WORLD...

~KRUGER~

The Ballad of Seventh Heaven Peope - Keep in Touch

Mamachi flies so high..thought Jungle Boy.
I couldn't even say hello anymore to her...
I can barely have a chit chat like the way i used to do with mamachi..

Sigh....
Jungle boy feel a bit confuse...
He tries and tries...so hard..to bring mamachi back to the path he want it to...

All so sudden..
MaMachi send a love message to jungle boy..
I miss you jungle boy..says mamachi..

Jungle boy replies....
I was rushing for nothing until you whispered in my ears, "no need to hurry cause nothing is running away from you"

Jungle boy is surprised..
He eventually thought that...
Sometimes eevn a sweetest love like ma machi need time to be alone, to realize how much she loves her jungle boy, bless her....


kruger

Di atas normal - Peter Pan

pikiranku
tak dapat kumengerti
kaki dikepala
kepala dikaki
pikiranku
patutnya menyadari
siapa yang harus
dan tak harus kucari

tetapi tak dapat ku mengerti

sesuatu
yang baru kusadari
kau tinggalkanku
tanpa sebab yang pasti
sesuatu yang harusnya terjadi
kau sakiti aku
kau yang harus kubenci

tetapi tak dapat kumengerti
tetapi tak dapat kumengerti

ku mencari sesuatu yang telah pergi
ku mencari hati yang kubenci
ku mencari sesuatu yang tak kembali
ku mencari hati yang kubenci

ku mencari
tetap tak dapat kutemui
ku mencari hati yang kubenci

This morning ma sista picked me up. Selama diperjalanan, mendengarkan lagu Peter Pan terus - terus dan terus lagi..
Tiba sampai di lagu ini, tiba - tiba aku merinding..hehehe, gak tau kenapa..
Well..there must be something afterwards...what is it? Well i don't know..
But i'll find it out..

~kruger~

end of the year

playing games, is such a fun
i like playing
playing with my cigar
playing card
playing with money
playing with my mouth
playing with myself
my hair
my job is a game
this word is a game
look at this letter
abcdefg
playing such a fun, isn't it?
this serious game is our life
yah, everything is seriuos by the way

what the hell is im trying to say??




Enjoy yourself
Sometimes we win, sometimes shit happens
(this logic about game and fun is begin to make sense, right?)
Smile
Don't worry


im happy for what i am
can't complain,......shit still happens, but
yeahh,... i fell peace in my heart
^^,

- immortal -

Love is no big truth by Kings of convenience

Remembering KL ...
I listened the songs of Kings of convenience every day in KL..
They were a tranquilizing company...
So here we go..
I can barely laugh at every words in this song.
Particularly remind me of many things happened in ma sparkling life..
Heil to the words they've created..




here's the excerptions...
All I do is sleep all day, and think of you
A memory of the cushion life I'm clinging to
The image of a mutual one, our haven
The sombre chords of our song, the fading

Love is no big truth
Driven by our genes, we are simple selfish beings
A symphony that's you
Joyously awaking the ignorant and sleeping

Passion and its brother hate, they come and go
Could easily be made to stay for longer though
Many people play this game so willingly
Do I have to be like them, or be lonely?

Love is no big truth
Driven by our genes, we are simple selfish beings
A symphony that's you
Joyously awaking the ignorant and sleeping

I'll never need it again, not again, not again..

by the way..siapa bilang KL bersih?
Lihat nih betapa joroknya....

~kruger~

For The Sake of Yesterday

How do i look?
This pic has been taken 2 years ago...
I was good back then..and still am..hehehehehhehe

for the sake of yesterday
~kruger~

Blah Blah Blah

AT HARDROCK CAFE
FROM LEFT: TOMMEE, JOHNNY PITSTOP, ME AND NOT - NOT
UNDER THE SUN EVERYBODY'S GORGEOUS

Contemplation Part 1

Berulang kali pertanyaan muncul di benak.
Kenapa gue gak sedih yah..
Kenapa gue gak merasa kehilangan yah..
Kenapa yah..

Rasanya, kemarin - kemarin gue bisa disamakan dengan tipe orang mellow..yang sering menyakiti diri sendiri dengan mendramatisir situasi..
Apakah saya sudah dewasa?
Atau mungkin saya sekarang sudah berubah?

Apakah setiap kejadian yang terjadi ku anggap biasa saja?
Apakah kepedihanku selama ini sudah cukup mengajarkan aku banyak hal?
sampai - sampai aku tidak rela manaruh ekspektasi apapun?

Well apakah mungkin semua yang terjadi sudah tidak ada artinya lagi buatku?
hahahahahahha...segar juga rasanya..merasakan perasaan biasa biasa saja

Butuh seribu kejadian untuk membuatku mendapatkan perasaan seperti ini.
Bukan hampa, bukan kosong ...tapi rasanya aku sudah bisa mengendalikan rasa marah dan sedih dalam diriku..

Seperti yang selalu aku yakini..yaitu:
Happiness is only a state of mind..
It ould be created..
We don't need anyone anything to make us happy..

Am I rite?
Every pain i got has taught me a lot then i ever imagined
Am not gonna torture myself with some silly feeling anymore..
I am now more mature than i was back then..
Or at least i can conquer my biggest enemy, that is ME...

I may be wrong but at least i follow my innerheart, which will lead me into the right path.But if not, at least i have respected myself....

~kruger~

Bertemu dengan Idola

waktu ketemu chrisye di Launching AWAIR...

~kruger~

I Want to masturbate this noon

Masturbate?
Yeah.....
I mean..i want to make myself happy by myself..

I want to have lunch alone at Jepun resto near my office..
I want to have a decent conversation with myself..

I Don't need any company for now..
for i want to masturbate..
please give me space..
Don't need any arguement..
Don't need any simpathy
Yet I am strong enough to conquer whatever has came to my life..

I want to masturbate this noon..
Let me be alone...
For a while...

~kruger~

The Ballad of Seventh Heaven People - Simply farewell...

Jungle boy has left his hometown.
Now he's back to the world of strangers, the place where he lived in many moon shines and many sun shines and still is till now.
Fully he begins to start his day with inspiration..

Ma Machi has shifted, recall Jungle boy..
Once he said in his songs...
Everything else has changed but my soul stay the same..
I don't live for nothing...

Jungle boy..start to recall what he has been through with Ma Machi..
The Tears, The Fight, The Yell, the Happiness..and absolutly The Love...

For he doesn't know what had happened in many moon shines and many sun shines in his hometown..., he was trying to understand every move Ma machi sways...
Yet he describes Ma Machi in his own way..

In front of the opera house- accross the harbour..
slowly he begin to understand her, without any unspoken word he begin to hear he, with the passion he begin to feel her, and with her he begin to discover what his life is all about, which is full of her......

To my imaginary jungle boy whereever you are ....
~kruger~

The Ring

My spouse just got back from his "HEIMAT"
brought many things for me and my sons..
And one of the gifts is a ring - gold ring...

I was surprised...
and "terharu"


....March 1 - 2002...
I Married to the guy i 've been dated for nearly 4 years...
At first i thought ..he's a way out of my league
But now..i could feel and see how everything he did..was, is and will always sincere...

Mein schatzzzz.....
Hope we could be together forever for better or worst..
Till death do us apart...

~kruger~

Simply Farewell

The excerptions of Kings of Convenience's lyrics..

Misread...

If you wanna be my friend
You want us to get along
Please do not expect me to
Wrap it up and keep it there
The observation I am doing could
Easily be understood
As cynical demeanour
But one of us misread...
And what do you know
It happened again


KL...24 Nov 04
I bought the CD at Sungai Wang Plaza
See the blue sky..
See what's inside..
Hope finally see the truth....
Tangible or not tangible..
at least ...
at least..
i experienced it...



~kruger~

The Memories are still linger on

Jogjakarta:
Sementara aku sedang membereskan meja podium press conference....

Hi, We meet again..
hmmm kok seperti ada yang ngajak ngomong yah??
Hi..We meet again..

Oh sorry, are you talkin' to me?
Yes..
Oh..yea..we meet again..
How are you..
Oh i am fine..

Well Nice to meet you..aku harus jawab cepat, pikirku dalam hati ....aku capek..mau balik...mau tidur...

Percakapan terputus.
Sore berganti malam. Kota Jogjakarta ternyata masih seramai kemarin, hari ini dan bahkan mungkin besok. Tapi aku kesepian. Jauh dari rumah.

Waktu bergulir. Cerita demi cerita terajut.
Intesitas terbentuk. Entah kenapa waktu dan situasi seperti menjadi budakku..
Mau saja kuatur seenak hatiku..

Sekarang, waktu sudah berlalu.
Tidak mau patuh lagi pada keinginanku.
Semua lakon yang ingin kumainkan sudah tidak bisa ditampilkan.
...

Terpaksa jauh dari kenangan indah.
Waktu tidak mungkin bisa dikembalikan, dipinjam atau dicuri
Waktu sekarang yang jadi penguasa.

Ruang dan Benua pembatasku kini.
Aku berteman dengan sisa - sisa kepingan kenangan yang masih bisa direka - reka
Indah...Indah..Indah...

one fine tuesday evening...
Kringgggggggg...
Hello ma bub..
How are you?
I am fine..hey whatta surprise...
blah..blah..blah..

let the memory linger on...

`kruger~

Lupa daratan...

Bill telepon bulan Oktober Rp. 7 .053.000,-
Bill telepon bulan November Rp 6.000.000,-

Gila???
Elu telpon siapa aja??!!!

Are you loco??
Are you that rich??

Mi GOD...
What is wrong with you?
Are you stone out of your mind?


Yeah..
I know...it sounds loco, crazy or whatever you can call me with...
But there was something..
Don't ask me..what it was..
Coz till now i can't describe it yet..

To my logic..
To my pocket..
To my beloved mate..
To my lovely tears..
I appology for any stupidity i committed..
Yet i never regret

Things happened for many reasons

~kruger~

Well Well Well Well

Internet broke down
Udah seminggu lebih, kantor seperti kehilangan setengah jiwanya
alias setengah mati.

Betul! setengah mati mencoba untuk mencari segurat inspirasi dalam kekurangan dan tanpa daya internet.
Banyak sekali rencana yang berujung tidak terjadi.
Banyak waktu yang tersita untuk sesuatu yang berdasarkan perasaan!

Huh kasihan banget ya logikaku..terpaksa sering istirahat kayaknya.
Mestinya dipakai 24 jam/hari
Ini malah sebaliknya
Mungkin hanya sepersekian detik dari waktuku selama sehari...

Well...Well...Well...

Punya banyak ekspetasi salah
Tidak mau buat rencana jadi banyak yang ngambang
Kasihan kan kalau sampai orang lain harus ikut - ikutan mencari karet pelampung supaya gak tenggelam karena kengambangannya aku..

Jadi kalau semua kali ini, kemarin dan besok masih tergantung sama aku, berarti aku adalah nahkodanya dong?
Well Well Well

Berapa harganya untuk sebuah pengorbanan yang timbul di hati, di tubuh dan di pikiran?oppsss aku gak pakai mikir sih)...

Aku mau pulang dan tidur
Menulis rangkaian kata yang rencananya jadi novel (huh!!!kepentok sama males!!!)

Well..Well...Well...
capek...
sudah lama gak minum "red bulls"
tapi gak ngefek..


~kruger~