Done.....

Inhale....exhale...
Thank God..
Thank you so much God

All *** are paid. now i am debt- free...
hoorayyyyyyyyyyyyyyy....

~kruger~

*sigh*

Yesterday a friend of mine called me.
She asked my opinion upon her problems...

Her: How do i endure that feeling- The urge feeling to call him?
Me: Is his influence really that big to you? Can you just shut your phone off and think about something else? Instead of wasting your money on something worthless? Is your life that dull, that you really need a spark? Do you believe that he’s going to be your savior?
Save you from harm, trouble? Don’t you think he’s only taking an advantage out of you?
Come on, it’s so him!

Look back,
See your dark moment back then, when you rolled every tears of pain …when you felt so empty…when you were alone…

Do you want to succumb to the lure of pain any more?

Her: yes i know...but this becomes stronger..
Me: What????
Her: yeah...
Me: Well...sorry i can't help you..you have to solve it by yourself.. coz the answer is in you...in your ego
Her:* smiled bitterly...*

~kruger~

PINCH ME PLEASE!

Here's an excerpt of the conversation on a fine Saturday evening

Himself and her were at a romantic place. She sat on his lap. Himself was hugging her so close.
“Come with me, please” asked himself...
“Where to?” she replied..
“To the seventh heaven of course..”
“No...”
“Why not?”
“I am not ready yet”
“What should you be ready for”
“For you knew already that this gonna be like this. “Don’t deny, we both knew that this is what we’ve been waiting for so long”
"Of course I knew it...but you see I don’t want to get addicted”

“What?” Ok, if you’re getting addicted, so what?”
“Come on. Just trust me. I will not harm you” Come let me lead your soul to the seventh heaven, where I can show you the color of me, the bitter of my soul, and the pain inside me. Perhaps, there we can release our anger and the bitterness. Shall we?"

"Ok, but careful. We might get hurt, for somehow we’re vulnerable”

Slowly himself led her to the path she almost forgotten. There they were, in the seventh heaven.

“So how do you feel?” Asked himself to her

“Pinch me!” said her.“For I doubt this tremendous profound bliss I’ve got just now. It’s been a long since my last trip to the seventh heaven”

“So, do you still have a fear of getting addicted?”

She deeply looked at himself's eyes, without any word came out of her mouth. She didn’t answer yet she smiled instead.

Mutely she said, “Yes I know, that I am going to be addicted yet I won’t scare. Coz I know...You’re my tranquilizer with no side effect”
~kruger~

Acceptance

Last year i won a writing competition. As one of the prizes, i got the priviledged to stay at one of the best resort in Bali. To accompany me to indulge this beautiful and quite remote resort, I went with my spouse. As we arrived in our room, there was a welcoming message. It was said
" True love is neither physical nor romantic. True love is an acceptance of all that is, have been, will be and will not be.."

By all means that if you have love you will accept...
But what if you don't have any love?
Shall you accept?

~kruger~

Shah-Jahan

You knew, Emperor of India, Shah-Jahan,
That life, youth, wealth, renown all float away down the stream of time.
Your only dream was to preserve forever your heart's pain.
The harsh thunder of imperial power would fade into sleep
Like a sunset's crimson splendour, but it was your hope
That at least a single, eternally-heaved sigh would stay to grieve the sky.
Though emeralds, rubies, pearls are all
But the glitter of a rainbow tricking out empty air
And must pass away,
Yet still one solitary tear
Would hang on the cheek of time
In the form
Of this white and gleaming Taj Mahal

(....)

Rabindranath Tagore (1861-1941),

~kruger, shah jahan -sahid jaya - october '05